Inviting Mania to Tea with Gracie Canaan

XANYLAND EP 006

I have to admit…it’s really fun when a comedian wants to go all in on their specific mental illness. Destroying taboos and stereotypes with certain diseases is part of the reason I wanted to make a podcast in the first place. This guest was not afraid to go there. 

Gracie Canaan, icon, queen, and diagnosed bipolar, is a total bad-ass. I literally want to be her. She is a stand-up comic based in New York. She wrote, executive-produced, and starred in a new short film called BOOTIE’S. A short film about one of her many side hustles — dancing. She can be seen in the indie comedy series “Under Cover Comic” and is an alum of NBC’s Late Night Writers Workshop. Not only is she a dancer and comedian, she is also an illustrator/designer for companies like Anthropologie and Martha Stewart Living. A woman of too many talents to count, Gracie is awesome and by no means lets her bipolar disorder stop her from living, and I truly mean #living. Goals.

Gracie’s stand-up and mental health journey really began 10 years ago. She was hospitalized for a manic episode and suicide threats after moving to New York from Philly to try her hand at stand-up. Like I said, she was as transparent as they come. 

Bipolar is not something we’ve touched on in such a direct way yet. It’s basically a volleyball in the brain of manic episodes mixed with depression. These manic episodes can manifest differently depending on the patient. For Gracie, they are like the no sleep go, go, go, I can accomplish everything and anything blimps before the all-crushing, fearfully, never-ending, depressive swings. She compared it to being like Gollum/Schmiegel. Honestly, a perfect representation, I understand it immediately. 

Gracie was literally giving me tips on therapy wisdom I wanted to implement in my life. I felt like the client, and she was inspiring me to make changes in my life! Everyone should have a phone coffin. Gracie described having a locker for her phone: when she knows she’s about to enter a manic episode, she locks her phone away to avoid distraction and overindulgence. Mania can take many forms, and for Gracie, one of those is impulsive behavior…like spending money you shouldn’t on a leather jacket you found on eBay.

Gracie loved that I referred to her as “SMI,” for those in the industry, someone with “serious mental illness”. She coined the phrase LMI or “literally mentally ill”, which…I know many of us identify with. But even with a serious mental illness, with the right cocktail of medication and actionable items to manage mania and depression, Gracie and many others can be high-functioning mentally ill people. Doesn’t that have a nice ring to it! 

Gracie is so fucking cool. You really should listen to this one to hear all the crazy things she gets up to in New York. She was making me want to move! And it just goes to show that for a place that can be so overwhelming, especially for someone experiencing a mental crisis, knowing yourself and knowing how to manage your mental health can’t and won’t stop you. I’m more into the comedy and mental health thing, but if you are into OnlyFans, check out Gracie’s

If YOU have an idea for an episode (suggestions of topics, some cool comedians to send our way), email me at aliciaracine@gmail.com! Can’t wait to hear from you! And if you loved this, please comment anywhere you listened to this episode- we need that street cred 😎